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My Pal Jason’s Finest Breakup Recommendation

A couple of weeks in the past, my buddy Jason and I went to dinner. We mentioned work gossip and Ted Lasso and whether or not we must always share the rigatoni, after which the dialog turned to breakups. We’ve been pals for 20 years, so we’ve helped one another via some heart-wrenching relationship shutdowns. All of a sudden, he mentioned one thing profound…

“When somebody’s heartbroken, they typically need somebody with the precise profile as their ex — the identical appears to be like, the identical humorousness. After they think about the longer term, they need that particular person. However it’s a must to notice: you’re by no means going to search out the identical particular person with the identical attributes, however you will see that somebody who makes you are feeling the identical method.”

How lovely is that? And the way true.

After I was 22, my school boyfriend and I broke up as a result of he was in Michigan and I used to be in New York and neither of us might budge on transferring. My coronary heart shattered. I used to be satisfied that I’d by no means be completely happy once more; I imply, how might I ever love anybody else? His dimples! His sweaters! The best way he’d all the time look throughout the social gathering, after he made a joke, to ensure I used to be laughing. However, after being crushingly unhappy for some time, I felt okay once more. Different relationships got here and went, and, just a few years later, I met Alex. And, you’ll by no means imagine it: he made me really feel the identical method. Solely higher. And safer. And much more in love.

Jason, you sly genius! Thanks for sharing this perception.

Ideas? What recommendation would you add? Have you ever gone via a breakup just lately — or are you going via one proper now? If that’s the case, I’m sending you the largest hug!!! It’s the worst!!!

P.S. A seven-step guide to heartbreak, and four things to tell a friend after a bad breakup. Additionally, my sister’s awesome dating tip.

(Picture from the film Someone Great.)

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